THIS round was a rest week for the Mayors in their main league, so I got to sit back and actually enjoy the football for a change. Well, when I say enjoy, I mean stare at the screen sweating buckets and praying that none of my players got hurt before the prelim.

I did genuinely enjoy watching the Collingwood v Richmond game, however, if for no other reason than to see Jake King try every conceivable method of giving Alan Didak a free kick. (For the record, Jake, the one you missed out on was picking up a chair and smashing him over the head with it).

The other big highlight of this match was the departure of one of Toyota AFL Dream Team’s greats – a man who, for many years, led the Mayors’ defence with distinction. I speak, of course, of Joel Bowden – champion player, loyal clubman and fearless accumulator of cheap stats.

My only regret is that they didn’t dust off Patrick Bowden for his testimonial and give Dream Team fans some vintage chips across half-back, just for old time’s sake.

Big calls

As we approach the crucial last games of the season, it’s time to make some tough calls – calls that, for many of us, could mean the difference between elimination and Grand Final glory. No call is tougher in a big game than choosing your captain.

If you’re like me, you start to believe that your captain choice directly affects player performance. It’s as if the heavy mantle of Dream Team leadership prevents a player from concentrating on his own game.

This week, for example, I imagined Joel Corey and Jimmy Bartel sitting on a bench at training. I put the little C on Joel and suddenly his hamstrings tighten up and he feels 20 kilos heavier. I move it from Joel to Jimmy and suddenly Jimmy’s hip starts to ache and Joel feels like a million bucks! He leaps up from the bench, declares himself fitter and hungrier than he’s ever been, and then goes absolutely berserk on Saturday.

And that’s exactly what happened. Cheers, Joel – you owe me a beer.

Blaming Calvin

Sometimes, when I can’t make up my mind who to curse with the Mayors’ captaincy, I look for someone else to make that decision for me – someone I can blame when it all screws up. The man I turn to is Calvin.

Calvin is one of the founders of the Dream Team website DreamTeamTalk, along with Roy, Warnie, Chook and some guy called Chopper. One of the many features of this site is a weekly segment called ‘Calvin’s Captains’ where Calvin (sporting an eye patch and a parrot shaped like Gary Ablett) lists all the options, discusses the stats, grounds and possible taggers and then produces his top six captain choices.

Of course, there’s nothing to stop you from doing all of this work yourself – and if you’re like me, you probably will. There’s no guarantee that Calvin knows any better than you do, either. Calvin is not God, Calvin does not have a crystal ball, and Calvin cannot, as far as I’m aware, see into the future.

When in doubt, though, it’s fun to go with Calvin because then you don’t have to blame yourself. Bartel gets 69 – blame Calvin. Steve Johnson gets 62 – what the hell was Calvin thinking! Dids stinks up the place with an abysmal 45 - for God’s sake Calvin, lift your freaking game!

These days, I tend to blame Calvin even when I don’t take his advice.

Talking the talk


The DreamTeamTalk league is as fiercely contested as any, with current top scorer Warnie ranked 68th last week and his fellow panellists not too far behind. It’s an amazing effort from a group of Tasmanian teachers and just goes to show the kind of populist, grass roots support that Toyota AFL Dream Team inspires.

Sure, there are other fantasy games out there – but they will always be the Pepsi to Dream Team’s Coke – the Hungry Jack’s to Dream Team’s McDonald’s – the Caddyshack 2 to Dream Team’s Caddyshack (I seriously must be the only person who has seen both those films).

As the DreamTeamTalk slogan says – “DreamTeam’s alright by me – Dream Team’s alright – oh yeah!”

This week’s question

This week, I want you to complete this sentence “One lesson I’ve learnt from Dream Team this year is ...” and send it in to dreamteam@afl.com.au, making sure to put ‘Hindy’ in the subject line. I’ll run the best answers in next week’s column.

Thanks to all those people who answered last week’s question “I’m going to remember round 19 because ...”

My favourite answer came from James Edmiston who was so despondent over the Round 19 carnage that he was driven to supporting the Tigers again. That really says it all.

Cheers,

Hindy
CEO and coach of the Hindsight Mayors


The views in this article are those of the author and not necessarily those of the clubs or the AFL.