STRAP yourselves in, footy fans - Damian Barrett's Sliding Doors is back in full swing for 2026.

With the 2026 Toyota AFL Premiership Season approaching a dramatic conclusion, Damo's got plenty of thoughts about all 18 clubs - and the AFL.

So what is he saying about your team? What's he saying about the AFL? You can't say that, Damo, can you? Check it out below.

>> ALL THE LATEST NEWS AND OPINION FROM DAMIAN BARRETT

IF ...

the Adelaide X-factor missed last year's finals series, through needless suspension, which ended disastrously ...

THEN ...

Izak Rankine owes the Crows. Izak under even more pressure than Nicksy.

IF ..

Hugh McCluggage was always being selected for this qualifying final, having recovered from yet another soft tissue injury this year ...

THEN ...

it's still tough on Ty Gallop. He's done nothing wrong, Ty, other than being the most disposable talent for a player who has struggled this season but who finished last season among the best 15 players in the comp.

IF ...

Ben Hart in '92 and Dustin Fletcher in '93 are the benchmark debut AFL season defenders ...

THEN ...

Harry Dean is nearing that zone. And if he brings down Jez or Neale under Friday night lights, and the Blues win, he might just surpass them.

IF ...

seemingly everyone wants to line up and bag this joint for its list management ...

THEN ...

not me. Give me a team which is proud enough to try to make finals every single year. The Pies have proven – via the 2022 (prelim final), 2023 (premiership) and 2025 (preliminary final) seasons – that you can both look at the future and have a genuine crack at the only thing that matters. And in the pursuit of Neale and Hogan, they are going there again. I love it.

IF ...

Merrett and Ridley still want out ...

THEN ...

that's not on new coach Mark McVeigh. But it's going to hurt him. As Brad Scott and Dean Solomon discovered this year, there's not a lot to work with.

IF ...

I refused to be worried about the two losses from the last three of the home and away season ...

THEN ...

I clearly should have been, and I'm very worried now. So many guns went missing on Thursday night. And the coach, well, he went missing, too. This club embarrassingly chose to go back to its suffocating, conservative ways against Hawthorn, and it now has a very long week to reassess before it plays Geelong or Carlton.

IF ...

Max Holmes is at least 73 per cent fit ...

THEN ...

that would give the Cats an 82.76 per cent chance, on my very dodgy maths, of winning their elimination final against the Blues. Holmes is their best player. I hope his suspect foot will get him through this game, and the potential three beyond it.

IF ...

the Suns are signing Pendlebury on a two-plus-two deal ...

THEN ...

I'd love to know the financial breakdown. Two seasons as a player – his next game as a 39-year-old – and two as an assistant coach. Salary cap, soft cap. Would love to see the fine print.

IF ...

the great man Toby is meeting with Geelong people this week ...

THEN ...

it's not looking good. Nothing is looking good for this club right now, on and off field. 

IF ...

Sic has produced performances that have secured for him an All-Australian and a best-and-fairest ...

THEN ...

Thursday night, in Perth against Fremantle, was arguably the finest of the 202 games since his 2015 debut.

IF ...

you want to see it as glass half-full ...

THEN ...

the 2026 season was a very good one. But if your vantage point is glass half-empty, you're wondering what it actually meant. Potential fairytale for 23 weeks. Losses to Western Bulldogs to Carlton after that. And now not qualified for the "old" finals format. Need to add high-end talent in the off-season.

IF ...

the Clarko sacking was old-fashioned in its ruthlessness, and the public explanations for it joltingly honest ...

THEN ...

well played, Sonja Hood and co. Clarko will forever be remembered as one of the great coaches, but the resources required to "manage" him became mountainous. This was the right call. And now begins the pursuit of an untried coach. Even with Tasmania, Carlton and Essendon recently appointing new coaches, North effectively has the entire market to itself, as it wouldn't have identified Kenny, Frase or Spike anyway. Jaymie Graham and Corey Enright, and others of their unproven ilk, come on down. 

IF ...

the 2026 season was a bad one for the club ...

THEN ...

I was rapt for JHF. An inaugural best-and-fairest. The first of many.

IF ...

there are a dozen Tigers people already under extraordinary pressure going into the 2027 season ...

THEN ...

add the name Selwyn Griffith to the list. The new high performance manager. Good luck, Selwyn, with this mess.

IF ...

the Saints refused to trade Rowan Marshall last year ...

THEN ...

I don't expect them to be as reluctant in the upcoming trade period. He's wanted out since the targeting of TDK in 2025.

IF ...

the Big Three are out for the remainder of the year, and their absence leaves them borderline hopeless in Saturday's qualifying final against Brisbane ...

THEN ...

I still reckon the Swans are capable of a 2026 season finals win. And as unthinkable as this might sound, they are not without a sneaky hope against the Lions at the SCG. 

IF ...

it has embarrassingly become the norm for the Eagles to lose ...

THEN ...

it wasn't that long ago where they just wouldn't tolerate it. Here's the past five years of ladder finishes. 16, 18, 16, 18, 17. Have humiliatingly become the one thing they once laughed at about others: irrelevant. 

IF ...

the very-suspect Bulldogs' backline has held up OK recently ...

THEN ...

good luck Saturday night, against Walker, Thilthorpe and Fogarty. 

AND THIS ONE'S FOR THE AFL

IF ...

AFLX was Exhibit A of really bad ideas ...

THEN ...

Opening Round was Exhibit B. RIP AFLX and Opening Round.