IF the disgraceful treatment of players at a camp wasn't enough ...

WITH the AFL season about to relaunch, Sliding Doors is ramping up. 

So what's Damo saying about your club? What's he saying about the AFL? Check it out.

Adelaide Crows

IF ...

the disgraceful treatment of players at a pre-season camp, the regular big-name player exits, and the sacking of key officials wasn't enough proof that something is very, very wrong at this joint ...

THEN ...

confirmation came when its most decorated son, two-time Norm Smith medallist Andrew McLeod, felt compelled to go public with his own grievances. A terrible look, yet again.

04:14

Brisbane Lions

IF ...

Stef Martin's knee was in a brace as recently as seven weeks ago to protect a damaged PCL which at one stage was feared to be season-ruining ...

THEN ...

he's got some serious recuperative and healing powers, given he's ready for round two. Very, very important member of this team.

Carlton

IF ...

Patrick Cripps has already won three best-and-fairests at the Blues ... 

THEN ...

provided he stays fit, he'll get a fourth this year. A massive gulf to the Blues' next best player, probably the biggest gap at any club. Someone needs to emerge this season to help out.

06:00

 Collingwood

IF ...

there is one issue I now have zero care for ...

THEN ...

it is Eddie getting all worked up and thinking he has a God-given right to tell another football club how its guernsey can and can't look.

Essendon

IF ...

there is one word that Bombers fans still wince at ...

THEN ...

it is navicular, the foot bone which derailed the great James Hird back in 1999. Unfortunate that his son, Tom, a Bombers rookie, has suffered the same problem.

Fremantle

IF ...

Harley Bennell does get back to something resembling his best with Melbourne ... 

THEN ...

the Dockers will always be wondering why they invested four years but no more.

Geelong Cats

IF ...

the usual dilemma – who to play in the ruck - just doesn't go away ...

THEN ...

maybe it's time to take a punt on big Esava Ratugolea. Yes, he's still a work in progress, and yes, he may be better suited as a forward. But he may actually be the solution to the massive problem that, unless resolved, will continue to stop the Cats winning the flag.

00:29

 Gold Coast Suns

IF ...

Stuey Dew and list boss Craig Cameron aren't attempting to tee up sneaky meetings overlooking the Burleigh Heads surf with out of contract Power, Crows, Dockers and Eagles players ...

THEN ...

they should be. Will never be presented with a better selling opportunity.

GWS Giants

IF ...

there's one person in the AFL wired similarly to Australian sports' man of the moment Peter V'Landys ...

THEN ...

it's the Giants' CEO Dave Matthews. And if he wants a crowd at Giants Stadium in round two, then good luck stopping him.

Hawthorn

IF ...

Jaeger O'Meara had endured enough disruption through injury since an explosive AFL debut in another state in 2013 ... 

THEN ...

he could have done without the friendly fire of rookie list player Harrison Jones inadvertently fracturing his face at training.

Melbourne

IF ...

there actually is such a thing as a must-win game ... 

THEN ...

it is the Demons' next engagement, against the Blues, on Saturday week. Need to make a statement.

North Melbourne

IF ...

anyone in footy still needed convincing needed that the COVID-19 shutdown had destroyed the game we once knew ... 

THEN ...

it was North's sacking of Scott Gowans as AFLW coach. Couldn't have done any more than winning 11 of 14 matches in charge.

Port Adelaide

IF ...

you actually want to wear the prison bars guernsey in every single game ...

THEN ...

do it. Take Eddie on. I've got zero legal training, but can't see how the courts could care for this matter.

Richmond

IF ...

one thing has gone wrong in the past three seasons ... 

THEN ...

it was the 2018 preliminary final, specifically the inability to control the Pies' Mason Cox. Probably won't have to worry about him next Thursday, though, as he battles injury.

01:49

St Kilda

IF ...

the loss to North way back in round one was a bad one, given the massive lead the Saints had ...

THEN ...

the Bulldogs followed by Collingwood followed by Richmond looms as a very messy stretch.

05:57

Sydney Swans

IF ...

Buddy breaking down, again, was the most deflating development on the eve of the season resumption ...

THEN ...

I'm trying to stay positive and hoping that it means Isaac Heeney, in his sixth year, steps up to become the elite player he was always meant to be. Seems poised to explode.

00:30

West Coast Eagles

IF ...

as a club you've got your head around four weeks of life on the Gold Coast ... 

THEN ...

you may as well brace for a couple weeks more. With rounds six and seven to be released in the next 10 days, and with the WA border still shut to outsiders, every chance of a longer stint.

03:01

Western Bulldogs

IF ...

Bailey Smith was a stock ... 

THEN ...

I'd be trying to buy all of it.

 

AND THIS ONE'S FOR THE AFL

IF ...

the AFLPA pursues its demands for "full transparency" on finances ...

THEN ...

a potential counter argument would be: "Fine, we'll release every single line of our books, provided you agree to the exact wages of each player being made public, too."