STRAP yourselves in, footy fans - Damian Barrett's Sliding Doors is back in full swing for 2026.

With the 2026 Toyota AFL Premiership Season underway, Damo's got plenty of thoughts about all 18 clubs - and the AFL.

So what is he saying about your team? What's he saying about the AFL? You can't say that, Damo, can you? Check it out below.

>> ALL THE LATEST NEWS AND OPINION FROM DAMIAN BARRETT

IF ...

I've pumped up Izak Rankine in his seven seasons at two clubs ...

THEN ...

I'll continue to do so. But it's high time that he gets busy in 2026. His numbers look sort-of-OK on paper. Impact and presence way down. Gets a Friday night lights Showdown in round eight. Surely that will be his kickstart to 2026.

IF ..

there is an aged and world-weary 37-year-old among the ins for Saturday's match against Essendon at Marvel Stadium ...

THEN ...

there's also an uncapped 18-year-old. The brilliant Dayne Zorko is back. And we also get to see Cody Curtin, the No.43 pick in last year's national draft, in the same round in which his highly touted older brother Dan makes his much-anticipated return from injury for the Crows.

IF ...

the Blues can somehow block out the mess and psychological weight of their 1-6 scoreline ...

THEN ...

they will be a sneaky chance against the Saints. It is a big "if", but their form against Crows, Pies and Dockers was passable.

IF ...

the Hawthorn Moore would've slept soundly on Thursday night ...

THEN ...

the Collingwood Moore may not have got a wink. I feel for him. In the final 20 seconds, got to the right spot but dropped a mark, panicked and wrapped an arm around the neck of the Hawthorn Moore. One of the great Collingwood wins eroded down to one of the great Collingwood draws.

IF ...

the Bombers were humiliated on Anzac Day, and let's face it, there was no other word for it ...

THEN ...

not sure how just one player has been made to pay the price for that. I feel for Elijah Tsatas, the No.5 pick in the 2022 national draft. Omitted for Saturday's match against Brisbane. Brought back for three matches. But very clearly out of favour.

IF ...

Josh Treacy, Jye Amiss and Pat Voss as the key forwards don't kick 12 between them against a Bulldogs backline minus Rory Lobb and James O'Donnell, and with Buku Khamis left as the main big back ...

THEN ...

I will be surprised. And then there's Murphy Reid and Shai Bolton, who I'm also expecting to hit the scoreboard, hard.

IF ...

the great Mark Blicavs is out ...

THEN ...

the combo of Sam De Koning and Jake Kolodjashnij as ins doesn't cover, but it somewhat negates that. But a win on Saturday against North is far from guaranteed.

IF ...

the Suns were officially premiership favourites a month ago ...

THEN ...

they're a very long way off that status going into round eight. Three of the four wins this year against Richmond, Essendon and West Coast, those teams fully entrenched in the bottom reaches of the ladder. And despite their short-priced favouritism, Gold Coast far from a guarantee against GWS on Sunday.

IF ...

I've got a policy of never writing off the game's best players ...

THEN ...

I'm nevertheless getting worried about Jesse Hogan. Has been nowhere near his best this season. 

IF ...

there are now 98 matches on the CV of Connor Macdonald ...

THEN ...

No.98, on Thursday night against Collingwood, was right up there with his very best. A brilliant footy mind. Hawks wouldn't have gone near drawing that game with the Pies at the MCG without his brilliant three-goal performance.

IF ...

it caught many, including Demons players and senior staff, by surprise ...

THEN ...

Paul Guerra's axing by president Steven Smith was, in a business perspective, brilliantly clinical. Not messing about, the Dees. Since the last game in 2025, a new coach, CEO and president, and now another new CEO.

IF ...

the Roos were good against GWS and didn't get the rub of the green on a couple of adjudications ...

THEN ...

they still lost a game they should have won. In Clarko's fourth year, don't give me the honourable losses and improvement narratives. And now comes a very tough stretch – Geelong, Sydney, Adelaide, Gold Coast, Fremantle. At 4-3 after a very favourable fixture, need to jag a minimum one win from those five matches.

IF ...

it's great to see a Showdown in a Friday night slot ...

THEN ...

it would have been even greater to see it in isolation in a Friday night slot. This is the mightiest rivalry in the AFL, by a very, very long way. One day, the AFL industry might properly realise this, and give an Adelaide-Port Adelaide game a long overdue, standalone, nationally broadcast free-to-air marquee slot. And some time after that, we might even get properly aggressive with promotion, say, like the NRL has been doing since the 1990s in playing prized State of Origin matches outside NSW and Queensland, and the NFL in playing games all over the world, and seek to grow it even further with a heavily marketed and promoted Friday night game at the MCG.

IF ...

Sam Lalor has broken down yet again ...

THEN ...

what a disaster, on top of the myriad other injuries being suffered by Tigers players. How's the spin, this week, on the Tigers' latest injuries, too? Lalor's latest setback is supposedly merely a "partial Achilles injury", suffered in training. And Josh Smillie, the No.7 pick in the 2024 national draft who hasn't yet played a game, was merely "kicking a light ball" when he "sustained a small re-tear of the injury he acquired in February". But … "to be clear, the original surgical site's still intact". What relief.

IF ...

17 clubs are now looking for loopholes on how to "beat" the rule changes the AFL made this week to access Academy and father-son players in the national draft ...

THEN ...

Gubby and SOS would've already cracked the code. When there's a legal "rort" to be found, these two find it long before everyone else.

IF ...

Brodie Grundy's resurgence as an elite ruck has come in 2025 and 2026 ...

THEN ...

no coincidence that arguably the greatest modern era ruck, Dean Cox, has been his coach for those two years. What a fantastic achievement, game 250, for Grundy this Sunday. Against his great rival big Maxxy.

IF ...

the Eagles don't beat the Tigers on Saturday ...

THEN ...

there are more problems with this list than are already obvious. No excuses. 

IF ...

I haven't spoken a civil word with Bevo since the weeks prior to the 2015 Brownlow Medal and have zero desire to ever do so again, and to be upfront here, I know he has the same views of me ...

THEN ...

I still found myself nodding in full agreement with a lot of what he said this week in a self-confessed rant about major AFL issues. Particularly the point about Peter Jackson, who I have dubbed for 20 years the AFL industry's Mr Fixit, being given licence to take a holistic, start-from-scratch investigation into the competitive balance versus growth in the expansion markets debate.

AND THIS ONE'S FOR THE AFL

IF ...

Tassie is entering the comp in 2028 as the 19th licence and then a 20th team will inevitably join soon after ...

THEN ...

the AFL commission simply cannot waste the opportunity which now looms to properly fix its fixture. It has a genuine chance to revamp its outlook, and I would suggest it do as Collingwood CEO Craig Kelly urged three weeks ago: blow it up.