Adelaide Crows

If

you had your time over again  ...

then

would you have made the decision to play the already banged-up Sloane in round four? Zero chance. Hasn't been seen since, and we've learnt not to believe a word this club says about anything that relates to player injury.


Brisbane Lions

If

every coach gets a honeymoon period ...

then

Chris Fagan's is now over.


Carlton

If

it's been nothing but more doom in the opening half of 2018 ...

then

a glimmer of light awaits, with Fremantle the match-up at Etihad Stadium after the bye.

Collingwood

If

Grundy versus Gawn doesn't get you excited ...

then

you're hard to please. Bring on Monday for this on-field reason above all others.

Essendon

If

John Worsfold doesn't devise a game plan where Hurley is forced to conform to the style used in the wins of rounds nine and 10 against Geelong and GWS ...

then

the back half of the year will be as messy as the opening eight weeks. Last week was disastrous against the Tigers.

Fremantle

If

Ross was prepared to produce a flosser in the coach's box in round 11 ...

then

a nail cutter in round 12? A nose-hair trimmer perhaps? Hair straightener?

Geelong Cats

If

the questions still lingered even after 37 disposals and three goals last weekend (and we need to admit we did initially ask one of those questions) ...

then

Ablett can make they disappear for the remainder of 2018, at least, if this weekend he breaks the shackles of the game's best shut-down player in Jacobs.

Gold Coast Suns

If

you've managed just one behind from the past two final quarters you've played, and averaged just 39 points in the past two matches ...

then

without May and Hall this week against a rejuvenated GWS, we genuinely fear that a monster loss is coming your way.

GWS Giants

If

we're going to make a bold prediction going ahead of round 12  ...

then

it's that the Giants can still win the premiership ... provided they get back Greene and Scully.

Hawthorn

If

you take a sneak peek at the Hawks' remaining matches ...

then

you'll conclude they are making the finals.




Melbourne

If

Goody is as fit as his players are telling us he is right now ...

then

we reckon the ego will decree that it's budgie smugglers - and nothing else – for him down the Neale Daniher MND slide on Monday.

North Melbourne

If

anyone at the start of the season had have said the Roos would be a live chance against the Cats at GMHBA Stadium in round 12 ...

then

they would've been locked up.

Port Adelaide

If

every credentialed team is faced with a must-win game within the home and away season ...

then

for Port it is this one.

Richmond

If

as expected, Dusty is rested next week against Geelong ...

then

with the bye in round 14, it won't be until June 28 at the earliest that he returns. That'll make it 26 days between games, the perfect mid-season freshen-up.

St Kilda

If

there's a positive out of an axing ...

then

it is that the mental pressure actually gets released. Hoping Billings benefits from that, and that he's back to play the Suns in round 13.

Sydney Swans

If

you boast an 8-3 scoreline after the opening half of the season ...

then

you're going very nicely. But we're still to see something that convinces us you're a premiership hope.

West Coast Eagles

If

the Eagles aren't already refreshed from their week off ...

then

they should be. Started their holiday at three-quarter time of last week's game against the Saints.

Western Bulldogs

If

you take a look at the post-bye fixture ...

then

on exposed form, the Dogs will be underdogs for at least the next seven games. Ouch.

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If

there's a deadlock on an idea between the 'look of the game' committee and the 'competition committee' ...

then

we're going to need another committee. And then another one to oversee that.