| IF | THEN | |
| Adelaide | you wait until the final minute of trade period to execute your only deals ... | ... we reckon they’re after-thoughts. |
| Brisbane Lions | the call from Beams' management was the cake ... | ... the unexpected call from Christensen's management was the icing and the cherry on top. Beams, Christensen, Rockliff, Aish, Redden, Hanley, Zorko, Rich, Taylor, Mayes, Leuenberger, Martin. Look out. |
| Carlton | Brock McLean wasn't nervous about keeping a spot on the Blues list ... | ... he is now. Another inside mid in Mark Whiley, playing his exact role. |
| Collingwood | a B&F winner walks out on day one of trade period ... | ... you need to scramble. And the Pies did, with success. Paid overs for Greenwood, but sometimes you have to, and to then get Varcoe, Crisp and pick 5 made things more than OK. |
| Essendon | there’s one bloke we feel sorry for at this club ... | ... it is list manager Adrian Dodoro. While others refuse to take blame for what has happened, he’s being forced out into the trade poker game with a pair of twos. |
| Fremantle | someone at the AFL forgot to tell the Dockers that the 2014 trade period has not only started but actually finished ... | ... your list is too heavy. Something has to give. Something will give. |
| Geelong | you add Clark and Stanley to Hawkins, Vardy, McIntosh, Blicavs, Simpson, Kersten, Brown and Walker ... | ... your list is too heavy. Something has to give. Something will give. |
| Gold Coast | you thought Hawthorn's left-footers were impressive ... | ... Malceski added to McKenzie, Kolodjashnij and Harbrow in the Suns' defensive half looks pretty good too. |
| Greater Western Sydney | you twice in two days make definitive, strong public statements that you won’t be doing something – trading Boyd - only to then do that very thing – trade Boyd - when things got a bit hot ... | ... don’t ask us to believe you again. And you probably needn’t have given Boyd a spray on the way out, either. You did, remember, use the No.1 draft pick to secure him only 12 months ago. |
| Hawthorn | Jono O'Rourke doesn’t land at the Hawks ... | ... Mitch Hallahan stays. |
| Melbourne | the self-proclaimed Prince remembers that when you’re on an AFL club list that your foremost task is to play footy ... | ... the Dees might benefit from recruiting him. |
| North Melbourne | you bring in an injury prone midfielder, coming off a 16th B&F finish in a 14th placed side, on a big four-year-deal but fail to forecast that there would be collateral in the form of your own B&F placegetter walking out ... | ... that’s a lot of pressure on those who made the decision. And on Higgins. |
| Port Adelaide | you're in a premiership window and manage to add the one missing link to your squad ... | ... your premiership time is right now. No pressure, Paddy. |
| Richmond | you lose an elimination final by what felt like 150 points ... | ... hey, you may just choose to stick with the playing list you’ve got. As you were. |
| St Kilda | we can give the Saints one thing ... | ... it is this: they have a process and they are sticking to it. |
| Sydney Swans | the ridiculous and unfair AFL ban on the Swans trading-in players looked ordinary in trade period 2014 ... | ...fast forward 12 months. Shaw (33), Goodes (35), Richards (32), Pyke (31). If there’s one pet hate of this column, it is rules on the run. |
| West Coast | anybody knows what has happened to the Eagles since the 2014 season finished ... | ... can they please advise AFL headquarters. Search party is out looking. |
| Western Bulldogs | you lose your captain, your coach and your Brownlow medallist, and react by mortgaging your entire future on a 19-year-old with nine games and 31 kicks to his name ... | ... good luck. Selling hope will buy you a year, maybe two. And we really hope that revenge against the club which stole Ward and Griffen wasn’t the driving force. |
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Follow Damian Barrett on Twitter: @barrettdamian
