THE 2026 Continental Tyres AFL Trade Period is over, and that means Damian Barrett's Sliding Doors is coming to an end for this year.

So put your seatbelt on and enjoy the ride as Damo takes off the gloves one last time in 2026 and takes aim at your team.

So what is he saying about your club? What's he saying about the AFL? You can't say that, Damo, can you? Check it out below.

>> ALL THE LATEST NEWS AND OPINION FROM DAMIAN BARRETT

IF ...

it was a strange decision by the Crows to refuse 2026 national draft picks 33 and 49, as well as first and third round selections in 2027, for key back Nick Murray who couldn't secure a regular game this season ...

THEN ...

I also get it. Losing him and Jordon Butts in the one trade period after another underwhelming season would have left them very exposed down back.

IF ..

there are times when a player simply needs to separate from his club ...

THEN ...

that time arrived in the 2026 exchange period for Keidean Coleman. The sporting anguish of being the Lions' best player to half-time of the losing Grand Final in 2023 to missing all three of the premierships which have followed. Glad he could find passage to a fresh start at Essendon.

IF ...

you've heard the one about the early morning dropping of a toothbrush and subsequent head splitting on a soap container ...

THEN ...

well, yeah, whatever, Will Hayward. And now waiting for the AFL Players' Association to issue some frustrated words, and say it is disappointed, but not actually change anything, on what happens next with Lachie Cowan after an eventful weekend with Hayward and others. 

IF ...

Nick and Lachie sounds like an FM station program or podcast show ...

THEN ...

it may also prove to the most compelling midfield combo in footy in 2027. Cannot wait to see this three-Brownlow Medal winning, and a further five-time Brownlow Medal podium-finish duo in action.

IF ...

there’s been a whole lot of buzz about the new Essendon ...

THEN ...

it will be the same old Essendon on-field for a very long time. The Coleman and Bowes acquisitions won't go near making up for the Merrett and Ridley losses.

IF ...

the building of the Dockers' playing list has been a work in near-perfection during the past eight years ...

THEN ...

some sizeable holes are starting to emerge in the backline. Justin Longmuir might need to get creative in 2027 to ensure this doesn't become a problem.

IF ...

it was known that Sam De Koning was contracted for 2027 ...

THEN ...

it was also known that the Cats were open for business on conversations about him. No club knocked the door down for him. Time for SDK to make a genuine imprint on a season.

IF ...

the AFL signed off on the side deals involving Hawks Aidan Schubert and Sam Butler after the Suns' loss of free agent Ben King to Hawthorn ...

THEN ...

that's what happens. Just ask Port Adelaide. A good outcome for the Suns, given they clearly didn't rate King's 60 goals (for a 13th-placed team) in 2026. Third place in the Coleman, but 11 players ahead of him in the club's best-and-fairest.

IF ...

a lot of serious footy talent is off the books post the 2026 season, with no more Toby, Jesse, Lachie and Jake ...

THEN ...

there's still a lot of footy talent on the list. Should the Giants for once get an element of luck with injury, no reason they can't make finals.

IF ...

I was running the Hawks ...

THEN ...

I'd be requesting from the AFL a round one Friday night lights match against Essendon at the MCG. What a way for Zach Merrett to start Hawthorn life.

IF ...

30 players found new homes in the 2026 player exchange period ...

THEN ...

Bodie Ryan was both the least mentioned and among the lowest profiled. Demons secured him from Hawthorn in the final transaction, seconds before deadline. Might be an inspired trade. I thought he showed plenty in five matches for the Hawks this year.

IF ...

I was running North Melbourne ...

THEN ...

I would be requesting from the AFL a round one Thursday night lights match against Sydney at Marvel Stadium. What a way for Nick Blakey to start North Melbourne life.

IF ...

I quite liked Jason Cripps' sledge on the Western Bulldogs for a "never-ending victory lap" over landing Zak Butters ...

THEN ...

he seemed well-credentialled to make such an observation. This club has been on a slow victory lap itself. Yes, it's now got nice hands in the next two national drafts. All off the back of Zak Butters leaving, and the AFL signing-off on deals attached to his free agency status.

IF ...

I've questioned and critiqued and criticised the Tigers for cutting too thin on its playing list ...

THEN ...

part of me admires it for remaining all-in on that policy, in the lead-in to the Tasmanian licence making a mess of the 2027 national draft. Picks two and five in this year's draft. It certainly wins at securing top-10 draft picks, this joint. Overdue time to get those picks match-ready and game-developed, so that Adem Yze doesn't lose his job in the process.

IF ...

the Saints told us upon the close of the 2025 trade period that they had "plenty of money to splash" in the 2026 exchange ...

THEN ...

they must be saving their money for a rainy day. Or for the next contract for Nas, who already owns the most financially lucrative AFL deal. Have procured a nice national draft hand, the Saints, but it was a negative outcome on the 2026 playing list with one Marshall out and another Marshall in.

IF ...

no one in the AFL has a greater sense of theatre than Tom Papley ...

THEN ...

bring on the first Swans v Roos game in 2027. Surely it's round one. Paps' reception for Lizard will be box office.

IF ...

the Eagles think Jack Viney and Trent Rivers are going to solve their many problems ...

THEN ...

good luck. There are a lot of players from other clubs now on this list, not many who have the capacity to change fortunes.

IF ...

securing Zak Butters' signature was an outstanding outcome and one the Bulldogs can rightly be immensely proud of ...

THEN ...

surely it's now time to back-off on the self-congratulations, the backslaps, the borderline smugness. I get it. The video worked. Well done. But enough! 

AND THIS ONE'S FOR THE AFL

IF ...

it was good enough for 36-year-old Dane Rampe to officially be listed as a rookie with Sydney in 2026, and strongly possible for him to retain that status in 2027 as a 37-year-old ...

THEN ...

Zac Williams, a 32-year-old, 14-season, 183-match veteran at two clubs, is clearly going to be eligible for status as a Category B rookie on the Essendon list next year. Cambridge Dictionary definition of rookie: a person who is new to an organisation or an activity.