STRAP yourselves in, footy fans - Damian Barrett's Sliding Doors is back in full swing for 2026.

With the 2026 Toyota AFL Premiership Season underway, Damo's got plenty of thoughts about all 18 clubs - and the AFL.

So what is he saying about your team? What's he saying about the AFL? You can't say that, Damo, can you? Check it out below.

>> ALL THE LATEST NEWS AND OPINION FROM DAMIAN BARRETT

IF ...

I'm prepared to forgive the Crows for their lifeless performance in last week's Showdown 60 ...

THEN ...

I'm also worried that that performance was a throwback to the highly embarrassing two finals they played, and woefully lost, at the Adelaide Oval last year.  

IF ..

two-time Brownlow winner and two-time Brownlow placegetter Lachie Neale on Thursday night at the Cattery may have earned yet more Brownlow votes ...

THEN ...

on Friday night he will be having a glass of red with Ross The Boss, who wants him at the Saints in 2027. So many suitors. Footy life and options going nearly as well as ever for Lachie. An all-time great with a few more chapters in his book.

IF ...

Ripley's Believe it Or Not! has already got enough displays of the bizarre, strange, unusual and even unbelievable ...

THEN ...

maybe there's room for one more. Josh Fraser. The interim coach who inherited a 1-8 team, who is now six-for-six, who keeps saying he's not yet ready to be the permanent main man, and who, believe it or not, could get this team into a wildcard final.

IF ...

captain Darcy Moore has this season played just four matches and has now been ruled out for the remainder of it due to sustained soft-tissue injuries ...

THEN ...

that's a major worry for a 30-year-old. A brilliant leader who will need to wait for 2027 to play his next game, which will be the 200-match milestone.

IF ...

Dean Solomon is talking about the possibility of "filling water bottles" at Essendon next year ...

THEN ...

there's less than five per cent chance he's going to be the senior coach. Is 0-4 as interim, and losing confidence by the quarter.

IF ...

Plan A always had Sean Darcy as the double-pronged ruck option alongside the emerging No.1 player in the comp Luke Jackson ...

THEN ...

the Dockers just have to roll with it all the way through now. And there is comfort in the knowledge that Mason Cox is a very solid back-up, should glass need to be broken in emergency.

IF ...

I've been drinking the Geelong Kool-Aid for a very long time ...

THEN ...

I'm starting to rethink that hydration policy. Just sipping, after Thursday night, not skolling. Had a full set of players to play against Brisbane, and was no match. Outside of 36-year-old Danger, not one Cat could possibly have walked off GMHBA Stadium on Thursday night anywhere near a personal satisfaction level.

IF ...

Dimma's fuse is getting shorter by the losing match ...

THEN ...

look out on Saturday evening, should his Suns concede a sixth consecutive game, at home against Collingwood. 

IF ...

the injury list now has the names Jack Buckley, Jesse Hogan, Tom Green, Brent Daniels, Josh Kelly, Max Gruzewski, Jake Riccardi and Jayden Laverde on it ...

THEN ...

it's nigh on impossible for the Giants to make a run at the finals.

IF ...

Wizard is a massive out ...

THEN ...

Gunners is a massive in. Has played only nine matches this year, Jack Gunston, and yet could still win the Coleman. With 35 goals, just eight off the lead.

IF ...

the Demons have been very good this season under new coach Steven King ...

THEN ...

they will be able to claim excellent status should they beat the Hawks in Launceston on Saturday. Belted that team by 39 points only seven weeks ago, so they're a massive chance despite significant underdog status.

IF ...

I've been critical of North for the best part of seven years ...

THEN ...

in winning three in a row, I am happy to back off, for at least a week. This caper is a win-loss business. Roos should make it four, too. They have to beat Port on Sunday if they want me to believe they have properly changed for the better. 

IF ...

there are a lot of fantastic stories of players getting belated chances in the AFL ...

THEN ...

Josh Lai is right up there. Playing for Cheltenham in suburban Melbourne in 2024. Starring for Port in a Showdown in 2026.

IF ...

Tom Lynch is back ...

THEN ...

I suppose the Tigers have a very lightly beating pulse against Carlton on Saturday. But with only nine wins from 61 matches of Adem Yze's coaching, they're highly unlikely to win, yet again.

IF ...

Ross The Boss needed a distraction from his 6-9 scoreline ...

THEN ...

what a beautiful distraction! Somehow, the footy world knows that on Friday night he's having dinner with two-time Brownlow medallist Lachie Neale. The mind boggles as to how this info could have got out. And just remember, Lachie once walked out, with a year to run on a contract, of the Lyon-coached Fremantle. 

IF ...

Tom Papley, Justin McInerney, Logan McDonald, Sam Wicks, Joel Amartey and Braeden Campbell are all out injured ...

THEN ...

that's looming as problematic. But the Swans should still account for the Dogs under the SCG Friday night lights.

IF ...

Harley Reid placed third in the Eagles' best-and-fairest in his second season in 2025 ...

THEN ...

surely he is a mile in front to secure that title this year. Love the uncompromising attitude he takes to every contest. 

IF ...

Bevo has always been prepared to make the tough calls at selection ...

THEN ...

he's done it again in round 17. Rhylee West, who kicked 39 goals last year, axed for Friday night against Sydney.

AND THIS ONE'S FOR THE AFL

IF ...

the concussion issue is the most serious issue facing the game ...

THEN ...

the game obviously has to move, and has moved, to clean up a lot of its practices. But this game can never lose sight of its core appeal – that it is a contact sport, and that it can be physically brutal. The NFL, a far more dangerous game by a multiple of 25, has somehow found a way to not just survive the concussion issue but flourish.