IF Greg Norman once said 'I'm just in awe of myself' ... THEN. Picture: AFL Digital

IT'S BACK ... Damian Barrett's Sliding Doors has returned for 2022 and no one and NO CLUB is safe.

So put your seatbelt on and enjoy the ride as Damo takes off the gloves and takes aim at your team.

So what is he saying about your club? What's he saying about the AFL? You can't say that, Damo, can you?

>> CLICK HERE TO READ MORE BARRETT  

Check it out below, and don't forget to catch the latest episode of AFL Daily while you're here.

IF ...

the kid from North and the kid from Collingwood have stolen most of the 2021 draft kid headlines ...

THEN ...

the kid from Adelaide, Josh Rachele, may have something to say about that on-field. Gets a first-up gig, versus the Dockers on Sunday.

00:38

IF ..

there are a lot of players I'm excited to see in round one 2022 ...

THEN ...

none more than Cam Rayner, who missed all of 2021 with a knee. So, so important to this team, and will get the chance to establish himself in the midfield.

IF ...

the new Michael Voss-led era began with a cracking Thursday night win against the mighty Richmond and Sam Walsh wasn't even part of it ...

THEN ...

look out. There is a system to this set-up, finally. And they're very watchable.

IF ...

Mason Cox's six-season AFL career has had more downs than ups ...

THEN ...

under a new coach with new faith there's no reason the big American can’t still compile a prominent career. Don't forget he has twice single-handedly won finals for the Pies.

Collingwood's Mason Cox ahead of the 2022 AAMI Community Series clash against GWS. Picture: AFL Photos

IF ...

Jake Stringer is out ...

THEN ...

the Bombers won’t be opening their season, against the Cats, with a win.

Darcy Parish and Jake Stringer embrace after the round 22 clash between Gold Coast and Essendon at GMHBA Stadium on August 15, 2021. Picture: AFL Photos

IF ...

there was one player the Dockers didn't want to be without for the start of a campaign they hope will end in finals ...

THEN ...

it was Nat Fyfe. Line-ball game against the Crows now.

Fremantle skipper Nat Fyfe at Optus Stadium for the 2022 AFL Captains Day. Picture: Getty Images

IF ...

I've now long subscribed to the "there won't ever be a player to kick 100 goals in a season again" theory ...

THEN ...

Jeremy Cameron presents as the only current player to potentially make a mockery of that statement. Primed for a massive year, his second as Cat.

Geelong's Jeremy Cameron in action against Gold Coast in the 2022 AAMI Community Series. Picture: AFL Photos

IF ...

this season will determine the futures of so many people attached to this club ...

THEN ...

a win in round one against the beleaguered Eagles simply must happen. No excuses any more.

Gold Coast coach Stuart Dew at training on March 16, 2022. Picture: Getty Images

IF ...

Toby leaves a gaping hole up forward ...

THEN ...

Haynes leaves an equally big well down back. Been a gun for a long time.

Nick Haynes of the Giants looks to handball during an AFL Community Series match. Picture: AFL Photos

IF ...

there's a lot of anticipated comebacks in round one ...

THEN ...

James Sicily's is right up there. Hoping he can establish himself as one of the competition's very best backs in 2022.

Hawthorn's James Sicily runs out against Sydney in round eight, 2020. Picture: AFL Photos

IF ...

Greg Norman once said 'I'm just in awe of myself' after winning the second golf major of his career in 1993 ...

THEN ...

Christian Petracca would be more than entitled to make the same comment, after his past two games. Of course he wouldn’t even think of doing so, but we're witnessing something pretty special.

01:40

IF ...

Todd Goldstein has 273 matches behind him, a best-and-fairest and All-Australian jacket and is not far off turning 34 ...

THEN ...

he's going to like the look of his upcoming Hawk opponents on Sunday, Max Lynch and potentially Ned Reeves in Ben McEvoy's absence.

North Melbourne's Todd Goldstein with coach David Noble after the round nine clash against Hawthorn in 2021. Picture: AFL Photos

IF ...

Jeremy Finlayson was a lesser-light name in last year's Trade Period when he moved from GWS to Port ...

THEN ...

he's landed himself a very big role in his debut game for the Power, as the main replacement for the again-banged up Charlie Dixon.

Jeremy Finlayson at Port Adelaide's 2022 photo day. Picture: AFL Photos

IF ...

it's only a round one loss with 21 home and away matches to follow ...

THEN ...

no cause for panic. Yet. Will need to immediately eradicate the ill-discipline, though.

Richmond players leave the MCG after their loss to Carlton in round one, 2022. Picture: Getty Images

IF ...

Paddy Ryder is unavailable for the Friday night lights season opener against the Pies ...

THEN ...

really hope he's back for round two. Turned 34 this week, but may still be this side's most important player.

IF ...

Paddy McCartin's last AFL match was game No.35 in round 16, 2018 ...

THEN ...

absorb that slowly, and factor in the hardship, the unknown and the fear that has been at play in the time since. Game No.36 for him will be Saturday night, with new team Sydney and alongside his brother Tom, who was playing game No.7 in that corresponding round in 2018. This is one of the great stories of 2022, no matter what happens next.

Tom and Paddy McCartin during Sydney's official team photo shoot at the SCG on February 16, 2022. Picture: AFL Photos

IF ...

the Eagles have endured one of the worst ever pre-seasons, some of that self-inflicted and some of it just plain bad luck ...

THEN ...

the opening four rounds present as a major opportunity to put it all behind them. There are a lot harder collective tasks than Suns, Roos, Dockers, Pies.

West Coast's Josh Kennedy marks against Gold Coast in round one, 2021. Picture: AFL Photos

IF ...

Bevo's tirade on Wednesday was irrational, childish and plain pathetic ...

THEN ...

his apology, and the club's explanations around it, on Thursday seemed genuine, hit every single required note, and included a commitment to change. We all move on.

02:06

AND THIS ONE'S FOR THE AFL

IF ...

it's admittedly a small sample size of two matches, of a total of 207 for the season (198 home-and-away games, nine finals) 

THEN ...

the new adjudications on time-wasting and holding-the-ball are mostly working well.

Western Bulldog Bailey Smith after giving away a 50m penalty for umpire abuse against Melbourne in round one, 2022. Picture: AFL Photos