STRAP yourselves in, footy fans - Damian Barrett's Sliding Doors is back in full swing for 2026.

With the 2026 Toyota AFL Premiership Season underway, Damo's got plenty of thoughts about all 18 clubs - and the AFL.

So what is he saying about your team? What's he saying about the AFL? You can't say that, Damo, can you? Check it out below.

>> ALL THE LATEST NEWS AND OPINION FROM DAMIAN BARRETT

IF ...

my long-held opinion on the Crows before Thursday night’s match against Hawthorn was that they were too mentally weak to beat a good team in a marquee timeslot ...

THEN ...

that opinion was comfortably franked. Panicked at selection in recalling the very banged-up, and also questionable-in-big-games, Thilthorpe. And failed in yet another match which was there for the taking.

IF ..

the Big O missed the 2024 flag but was able to play a role in the 2025 success ...

THEN ...

Lincoln McCarthy missed both, with knee reco issues. He deserved to play in both. And now he’s suffered another setback, a badly damaged hamstring tendon. There’s time for him to get back for the 2026 finals series. But he needs some luck.

IF ...

Cripps, McKay, Florent, Hayward and a few others somehow produced their best games of the season the week after Vossy exited ...

THEN ...

let’s see them do so again in round 11, against Port Adelaide. And then again in round 12 and 13. Not reading anything, yet, into their miraculously rediscovered abilities to play a full four quarters of a game under interim coach Josh Fraser.

IF ...

time has always stood still for Pendles ...

THEN ...

come 4.35pm on Saturday, the clock will finally catch up to this living legend. In 432 matches before Saturday, Pendles, with ball in hand, has paused when everyone else has panicked. This has been a 21-year masterpiece.

IF ...

you want to see a masterclass in media messaging ...

THEN ...

revisit Brad Scott’s Fox Footy performance last Monday. Scott brilliantly handcuffed president Andrew Welsh and CEO Tim Roberts to the playing list decisions made in 2023 which are now making the 2026 season a nightmare.

IF ...

Justin Longmuir in April playfully said “there is no fun in my life” ...

THEN ...

surely there is at least a form of it now! Nine wins on the trot. Coaching in the AFL doesn’t get much better. And a Grand Final, here we come!

IF ...

Bazlenka finished third in last year’s Brownlow ...

THEN ...

he’s on track to go higher in 2026. Good luck on Saturday at the Cattery, James Jordon.

IF ...

the Suns have been unbeatable in the 10 matches they’ve played in Darwin in the past five seasons ...

THEN ...

history says they are easybeats in the block of matches which follow those Darwin games. In each of 2023, 2024 and 2025, Gold Coast has lost three of the four games which have been played after the Darwin success.

IF ...

Kingers keeps saying he’s not worried ...

THEN ...

I keep saying that I am. Giants look very, very ordinary to me. One way to prove me wrong: beat the winner of the past two flags on Sunday at Engie Stadium.

IF ...

Sam Mitchell was forced to play a game of footy for his own life and could choose only one player on his list to take into that battle ...

THEN ...

I reckon it’d be Blake Hardwick. Mitchell has loved Hardwick for a very long time, way before he single-handedly, as a forward, won Thursday night’s tough match against Adelaide in the borderline-arctic cold of Launceston.

IF ...

Matthew Jefferson looked really dangerous in round 10 in a big win against Hawthorn ...

THEN ...

I’m tipping him for a breakout game in round 11, versus a questionable, even with O’Donnell back, Western Bulldogs backline. He might kick five on Sunday.

IF ...

Clarko somehow let the Crows slam through 13 – thirteeeeennn!! - unanswered goals in round 10 ...

THEN ...

he’s on notice on Saturday at Marvel Stadium. The Roos’ match against the Suns is very winnable. But North does not win these matches under Clarko, now in his fourth season at the Roos.

IF ...

Josh Carr needs to make a statement as the new Port coach ...

THEN ...

no better opportunity than a Saturday night Adelaide Oval match against the beleaguered Carlton. Simply cannot lose this one. There may have been excuses in four of the Power’s seven losses this year being by a combined eight points. But no excuses in round 11.

IF ...

the injury list is now as long as a Michael Roach drop punt ...

THEN ...

it nevertheless should not be used as an excuse in round 11. Playing the mess that is Essendon, under Friday night lights, at the ‘G. There won’t be another opportunity like this in 2026.

IF ...

the Saints can scrounge even one win in the next three - Fremantle, Hawthorn, Sydney ...

THEN ...

their fixture opens up beautifully after that and they’ll get a genuine crack at making a final (and a reminder that the AFL has decreed that you only need to finish 10th to qualify for a final in 2026).

IF ...

The Chad has been very good in 2026 ...

THEN ...

he’s yet to reach anything resembling The Chad At His Very Best. Time for him to make a proper mark on the season. And no better time than 4.15pm Saturday, in an underdog Swans team against the Cats at the Cattery.

IF ...

I was harsh on Elliot Yeo three weeks ago when I said he was “delusional” in his response to a question about the Eagles being in a rut ...

THEN ...

I loved his and so many other Eagles’, particularly Harley’s, efforts in round 10 against GWS. Would love to see all of that replicated on Saturday. Hope they don’t get overawed by the 90,000 fans there to witness the Pendles pandemonium.

IF ...

the Bont, in my eyes, has been the best player in the comp since 2019 and the best I’ve seen since Wayne Carey ...

THEN ...

I am, with obvious bias, prepared to spare him the usual mindset I adopt. That when you cross the white line, there are no excuses. Bont’s got excuses right now. He can barely walk.

AND THIS ONE'S FOR THE AFL

IF ...

it’s good enough for the greatest sports comp in the world, the NFL, to regularly “flex” its fixture on the run to maximise marquee exposure to marquee moments ...

THEN ...

surely the second greatest sports comp, the AFL, can bring itself to do so. Maybe even just once in a hundred years. The Pendles moment simply should not be clashing with the game of the year, Cats v Swans. (Mind you, that Cats game should not be played at GMHBA Stadium, too). Please, please, please, let’s blow up this players’ union-focused rubbish about certain amounts of days between games, and also please, please, please, play the really big games at the really big stadiums.