WITH the 2022 Toyota AFL Premiership season racing to its conclusion, Damian Barrett's Sliding Doors is really starting to crank up.

So put your seatbelt on and enjoy the ride as Damo takes off the gloves and takes aim at your team.

So what is he saying about your club? What's he saying about the AFL? You can't say that, Damo, can you? Check it out below.

>> CLICK HERE TO READ MORE BARRETT 

IF ...

the Crows had simply apologised four years ago for what some players were subjected to at THAT camp ...

THEN ...

we wouldn’t still be talking about it. And one of the club’s most famous sons wouldn't still feel badly hurt.

BARRETT AFLPA's cop out makes Eddie's pain worse

IF ..

in the pre-season I tipped this team to make the Grand Final ...

THEN ...

right now I'm wanting to revisit that prediction. But to be equal-fourth on premiership points after round 20 and with the most points-for in the comp, there's still great hope.

IF ...

the past two 3.20pm Sunday matches have been among the very best of 2022 (Jamie Elliott's after-the-siren goal for a Pies' win, and the Tigers' comeback from 42 points down against the Lions) ...

THEN ...

hope it's a third in a row, with Lions v Blues in round 21. Massive underdog Carlton is a massive chance here. Curnow to kick seven to make things interesting regardless.

IF ...

Taylor Adams' injury is a massive blow ...

THEN ...

Brody Mihocek's recovery from one is an equally big positive. Despite the 10 wins in a row, I'm still a Magpies' flag sceptic. I won't be if they beat the Dees under Friday night lights.

IF ...

the Bombers have won five of the past seven (and one of the losses coming after the final siren) ...

THEN ...

that's an impressive form line, and there is a bit to like. But I'll reiterate my view – these are fake wins, coming only after the season was officially "dead".

IF ...

this team was having a really good year before failing to win in the past three matches ...

THEN ...

boring, game-day conservatism has evaporated the magic. One way to reignite premiership hopes – resume an attacking mindset and beat the Dogs at Marvel Stadium on Saturday. 

IF ...

Joel was the rightful focus of a famous personal milestone last weekend ...

THEN ...

he’s not even playing in round 21. Rested. Managed. Take your pick of word. Again. I love it. Danger might be given another break, too, before the home and away season is done.

IF ...

in the pre-season anyone predicted Mabior Chol would be equal-eighth on the Coleman Medal race after 20 rounds ...

THEN ...

they're a genius. 43 goals. Telling, forward line presence. Thriving in clutch moments. One of the very good stories of 2022.

IF ...

after last week’s loss to Sydney interim coach Mark McVeigh wondered if his players had "checked out", and proceeded to name eight players, and more pertinently not name the other 14, as to who really tried in that match ...

THEN ...

why bother when at the very next selection meeting the only three unforced omissions are three youngsters? Lot of noise only. And a lot of mess at this club at the moment.

IF ...

Big Boy didn't want to leave the Saints at the end of 2013 ...

THEN ...

in keeping with his just-get-on-with-it attitude to life it's no surprise that nine seasons later he, on Saturday, will hit game No.250. Two flags. An in-season recovery from a broken neck. Maybe the greatest ever when it comes to AFL no-fuss.

IF ...

some will frown on Ed Langdon for daring to be different and actually saying something provocative about an opponent the day before a match ...

THEN ...

not me. "(Collingwood) are all duck and no dinner … they are a bit of a one-trick pony at times." I loved it. Wish there was more of it. Also, full points for somehow producing two cliches involving two different animals!

IF ...

the Clarko project was once a pipedream ...

THEN ...

now it’s a mere dream. A lot more dreaming, and hard work, still to do, and absolutely no time to sleep. But sometimes, dreams come true

IF ...

Kochie has been unusually publicly quiet about the Power in 2022 ...

THEN ...

that doesn't mean he's been privately quiet. Wouldn't be surprised if a pointy-ended chat with Kenny is scheduled next week, win lose or draw against Richmond on Saturday night.

IF ...

Dusty won't be seen again this home and away season because of a hamstring ...

THEN ...

it's now possible he won't be seen again in Tigers colours. Making finals will give him a chance to play again in 2022. But what happens after that, only Dusty knows.

IF ...

the task to make finals is going to be tough, with matches against Geelong, Brisbane and Sydney to come ...

THEN ...

Dougal Howard returning after a knee injury is at least a massive help, particularly against a Hawkins-Cameron forward line on Saturday night.

IF ...

Robbie Fox hadn't had a kick in the AFL in 2022 before round 12 ...

THEN ...

he's seized the opportunity that he's been given since that moment. A 29-year-old still on the rookie list, making the absolute most of his chance to be a member of a team which is a live flag hope.

IF ...

I simply can't be bothered with the "who won the Judd-Kennedy trade?" debate ...

THEN ...

I can be with the quality of JK chat. A West Coast great, as important as any Eagle in their third wave of flag success since AFL entry. And when you finish a career having done something (kicked 715 goals) that only 23 others have managed in the history of VFL/AFL, then it's contextually all-time great regardless.

IF ...

the buzz around Jamarra Ugle-Hagan was big when he debuted last year ...

THEN ...

wait till Sam Darcy plays his first game. Can't wait for 4.35pm Saturday. The future is here.

AND THIS ONE'S FOR THE AFL

IF ...

an apology to Eddie Betts didn't come from the AFL on Wednesday ...

THEN ...

at least it transpired on Thursday. AFLPA should follow suit. Its words on Wednesday were mostly a cop-out.